Thursday, February 21, 2013

Kill me nao.

Sigh. One of the worse separation anxieties. Well... What can I do? Why don't you tell me what to do. It's so painful. It's such long wait. It's so tiring. I'm worn out, everything is tearing me apart. The weird tummy, sore nipples and all other crap. Stressful module with pressurizing lecturer. New group mates. It's just so much. It's so overwhelming.

I waited for so many days just to see him. I finally got to see him today. It felt like I waited for years even though its just four days. The time we had together seems so short. I'm sorry because I can't control myself. I'm sorry for making everything so tired. I want to kill myself because everything seems so hard and terrible. Both mentally and physically drained.

I don't want to be that understanding sometimes. It's hard to be so strong. And I know life is going to throw more shit into my face. So, in general, fuck my bloody life. I want to kill myself. I really want to. I don't want to go through any of these anymore. I'm not good with byes, and what sort of shit goodbye. There's no such things as goodbye. Bloody hell.

Ah welll. what to do?! I'm so bloody frustrated. I don't know how to handle myself. I can't control. Urgh. Bloody shitty screwed up life. I don't want any hellos anymore. The byes are too hurtful. I can't handle anymore.

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